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Inspiring Success on the Road to Recovery

Monday, December 2, 2013

Detaching From Emotional Negativity

By Elisabeth Davies, MC

Have you ever wondered, “Why do I feel so negative?
All of us have felt negative emotions at some time, or some point in our life. Emotions are created from thoughts. It is estimated that a typical human being has an average of 12,000 to 50,000 thoughts per day.
Negative thoughts bring forth negative emotions, and positive thoughts invoke positive emotions. Thoughts are generated from two primary sources, our beliefs and external influences.
Fortunately, you can control which thoughts you focus on. As thoughts arise, you can pay attention to them and grow the emotions they produce, or you can distract yourself by focusing on something else. Longstanding negative thoughts lead to depression and mood disorders. Longstanding positive thoughts lead to contentment and enjoyment.

An attachment to a thought is formed from repeatedly giving a thought your attention. This attachment, if repeated long enough, can become a belief. Beliefs drive your behavior and behaviors create your life.

Five thoughts toxic to emotions and mental health:
Hatred -  extreme hostility, or  desire for vengeance
Judgment - critical or fault-finding
Dishonesty - disposition to lie, cheat, or steal
Covetousness -  desiring something with no regard for the rights of others
Scarcity - deficiency or having less than what is deemed important

Ruminating on any of the above thoughts creates negative energy in your mind and adversely affects your mental health and well being. Having thoughts about the past that invoke toxic emotions is an indication that you have stored emotional negativity in your body.

Harmonizing energy
Your breath, thoughts, emotions, memories, and beliefs are all a part of this energy system. Holding your breath suppresses emotion and the flow of energy in our body. If done often enough, it can lead to Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. * Whereas full deep breathing dislodges and releases stored emotion. It is important that you do not suppress (cover up feelings) or repress (block feelings) emotions if you want to be mentally healthy. Having a healthy outlet, such as journaling, talking to someone you trust, or expressing emotions through a creative outlet are a few ways to let out stored feelings.

Detach from toxic emotions
Release negative thoughts each day. Take in a deep breath, expanding oxygen to your lower abdomen. Slowly exhale and say in your mind, “I release all negative thoughts and emotions from my being.” Do this for a minimum of 45-60 seconds to stimulate the parasympathetic nervous system (relaxation response). This releases the negative energy and stress built up from toxic thoughts.

Protect yourself from the negativity of others. Before you interact with negative people, close your eyes. Bring your attention to the coccyx (base of your spine). Focus on bringing up your breath from this area. This Life Force energy is the essence of the Creator/Source of Life. Slowly inhale this energy up from the tip of your spine to the tip of your head. You may visualize this energy as a pure light or color. Slowly exhale and imagine this Life Force energy expanding in your being. Repeat this breathing exercise for a minimum of 60 seconds or until you can visualize this Life Force energy expanding in you and moving out past your physical space, until you can visualize yourself encased in this energy. This energy acts as a protective barrier from others negativity and toxic energy.

Snip the cords of negative energy. If you are interacting with others and your mood changes, their energy has penetrated your being. This is fine if their energy is positive and it uplifts your mood. If their words (energy) are negative and your mood declines, snip this cord of negative energy by forming scissors with the index and middle finger of your hand. Take your hand and move it in a semi-circle around the front of your mid-section and quickly open and close your two fingers together, like scissors cutting the cords of negativity. Exhale the negative energy that has been absorbed. This is a literal action that reinforces your intention to detach from unhealthy forces in your environment.

Forgive the past. Forgiving yourself and others releases negative energy attached to the memory of a “wrong” that you did, or that someone committed against you. Each time you recall a memory of a “wrong” say to that thought, “I unconditionally forgive myself for___________(wrongful act),” or “I unconditionally forgive  _________(name of the person who wronged you) for saying or doing_________ (the act).” Forgiveness neutralizes our emotions and frees us to be present for new experiences that are presented each day. If you have truly forgiven, this will be evidenced when you recall the “wrong” memory and no negative emotion (hurt, anger, guilt, regret, or shame) is invoked.

Practice contented thinking. Happiness (positive emotion) comes from our own contented thinking. When we focus on what is good enough in our life on a daily basis, this grows contented thinking. Begin each day with noticing at least 10 things in your life you are grateful for. Say ‘Thank-You” for these things. This expands positive emotion in your energy system, flourishing mental health and wellbeing.

Detaching from emotional negativity not only enhances your emotional health, it also enhances the people you interact with by emitting positive energy for them to absorb.
Be mindful of the energy that you emit towards the people around you. The people you come into contact with will be able to feel it and their mood will be altered accordingly.
Always look for the beauty in life so that you can emanate positive energy.

Elisabeth Davies, MC is an author and counselor. She founded Bright Alternatives Counseling and has counseled thousands of clients struggling with addictions, depression, trauma, anxiety, self-esteem and relationship issues. She is also the creator of Good Things Emotional Healing cards©, which reinforce healthy thoughts and beliefs.  Elisabeth is the author of ‘Good Things Emotional Healing Journal: Addiction.’ It is available online, at her website, or on Amazon. Reach her at  (602) 478-6332 or Elisabeth@GoodThingsEmotionalHealing.com or visit www.GoodThingsEmotionalHealing.com

References
*Collinge, William PhD Recovering From Chronic Fatigue Syndrome: A Guide to Self-Empowerment